If Time Stand Still
Recently, there's so many things going through my mind. This year I'm going to be 31 in September. Just the thought of getting older is giving me a fright of my life. When I was younger, I find it ridiculous at the thought of people are afraid being old and weak. But I guess that is happening to me now.
Maybe I was feeling a bit insecured. I kept picturing what will happen, am I getting bald, what if I have weak knees, can I still climb the stairs? Will I loose my front teeth? Will I have enough money to buy me some not lasting happiness? Will I have any children of my own after many years of marriage, when will I die, what will happen if I die before my husband, will he still loves me or will he get married and get on with his life. There's nothing wrong but the thought of not being able to live forever or grow old with somebody you love is so frightening.
My mom died of cancer in 2005. I think I'm afraid if I will face the same fate that she had. I still got so many things to do in my life. There's a vast world out there that I haven't explore.
I also keep thinking if only life is forever.. if only the time stand still.... if we can live forever in the best moment of our life. But I guess it's just a wishful thinking. Everybody will leave this world one day. That's why we need to make the best of the time we have now.
I wonder if I have been living the life I really really want. All I know is it's a roller coaster and joyful ride.
Somebody close to me once said.....
Maybe I was feeling a bit insecured. I kept picturing what will happen, am I getting bald, what if I have weak knees, can I still climb the stairs? Will I loose my front teeth? Will I have enough money to buy me some not lasting happiness? Will I have any children of my own after many years of marriage, when will I die, what will happen if I die before my husband, will he still loves me or will he get married and get on with his life. There's nothing wrong but the thought of not being able to live forever or grow old with somebody you love is so frightening.
My mom died of cancer in 2005. I think I'm afraid if I will face the same fate that she had. I still got so many things to do in my life. There's a vast world out there that I haven't explore.
I also keep thinking if only life is forever.. if only the time stand still.... if we can live forever in the best moment of our life. But I guess it's just a wishful thinking. Everybody will leave this world one day. That's why we need to make the best of the time we have now.
I wonder if I have been living the life I really really want. All I know is it's a roller coaster and joyful ride.
Somebody close to me once said.....
"well life is one big joke"
I guess he's right.
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